Hidden Hot Rods at the 2011 Consumer Electronics Show

By: Allen Galbraith

What is the Consumer Electronics Show?

If it has a button, makes a noise, plugs into the wall, runs on batteries, lights up, or twirls around when you turn it on… it’s here. The show is the largest gathering of electronic doodads in the world. Acres of them, miles of them, plies of them in every possible size, shape, form and function. What does this mean for hot rodders? Well, the electronics industry would like you to put some of these modern miracles of technology in your hot rod.

Some of these optional electronics have been around for a long time. Factory and aftermarket options like radios, accessory lights and night time light sensors are not strangers to the hot rodding world. But the array of whiz-bang things one can stuff into a ride has become more than overwhelming. Don’t get me wrong, I’m no Ludite by any measure; I’m as technologically adept and dependent as they come, but even I took a moment to shake my head at the quantity of gadgets at the show that were targeted at the automobile.

What boggled my mind the most are products that fell into two contrasting categories: things designed to distract you from driving, and things designed to make the distracting things less distracting. Great racket, huh? It’s not enough to sell you the cell phone so yer buddies can text you about the great deal on exhaust bearings they just got while you are driving to the swap meet, but you now have to buy the gadget that READS your cell phone texts out loud to you so you don’t drive off the road staring at the tiny cell phone screen. Here is a tip: nothing anyone can text you is so important that you need to see or hear it while your car is in motion. If you can hear the electronic reader speak your text out loud, either you don’t have a big enough engine in your ride, or perhaps some open headers are in order.

Another category of products represented come from the in-car entertainment world. Stereo systems from the basic to those that would cause instantaneous and permanent hearing loss should one dare to actually listen to them while IN the car. These were made up of speakers the size of large pumpkins filling the trunk, power amplifiers and capacitors you could weld with, and more speakers in the passenger compartment than your local Cineplex surround sound system. Here is a tip, if you need a car stereo THAT large in your ride, you need a smaller engine or perhaps better mufflers are in order.

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, what does one expect at the Consumer Electronics Show other than loads of electronics? There were some hidden hot rods at the show to keep me entertained, though. The trio of identical red Camaros at the Pioneer booth, the smattering of exotics at various booths, and Vince Neal’s (the lead singer of Motley Crüe) 1932 Coupe in the lobby of the Venetian all caught my eye. I would have stripped the electronics out of all of them in order to hear the music the power plants made, but I prefer V8s to MP3s and Flatheads over 7.1 surround sound rear seat movie systems.

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